Marriage is believed to be a holy and everlasting relationship between two persons. Apart from being seen as an eternal bond between the persons, in practical society also it has a very binding legal as well as social effect.
Two people, once married, should ideally not separate till “death do them apart”. There are legal mechanisms that allow for separation, but there are yet to be widely accepted social mechanisms. A divorce is seen as stigmatic on the persons involved so much so that the stigma many-a-times carries on even to the families.
So, let’s see this picture as painted by those who condemn the married couple to the punishment of being together forever come what may. For a couple for which it worked out, the picture is very clear, they do not wish to be apart and thus their happily ever after stays in consonance with society.
It’s the other lot I am worried about.What happens when a person is unable to love the other as they thought they did/would be able to. Not all two persons are compatible and what happens when these two are not. The socially acceptable standard is that the two should find a common ground and ‘work things out’. “After all they are not enemies.”
This is what they should do, and most people I believe even try to. But some relations are just not meant to be. Now what?
Let’s see the picture from the eyes of these people. The colours have lost their brightness, there seems to be no joy in the picture, just a couple living by societal standards.
We are all humans, and thus these unfulfilled marriages are bound to have two persons who will seek outside, be it a physical relationship to vent the frustration or a more fulfilling emotional relationship.
But here’s the icing on the cake, when such an emotional relation is found for one or both parties, they still stay where they are because there is no way society and in most cases their families would allow them to divorce their present partner and get together with someone else (maybe also presently married).
Most of us here would have seen Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna; leaving aside criticial reviews of the movie, here is a scene from this movie that raises a valid question. Be a little patient and watch the whole video :
One of my fellow bloggers, Meera di had written a short fiction of this effect. When two married couples have all the persons involved being in love with someone ‘outside the marriage’, see what happens : read this.
And here’s one last example : How many here have seen the 1st story of ‘Das Kahanniyan’? That depicts the same point, doesn’t it? For all those who haven’t seen it or don’t remember it, here is the story in a crux. The wife in a supposedly happily married couple is in love with another person. This ‘boyfriend’ of her’s gifts her a necklace. As there is no way she can directly take the necklace home, she gives it to a jewellery shop and takes a coupon in return. She then tells her husband that she has won something from the jewellery shop and asks him to collect it for her. When he meets her and gives her a ring as the ‘gift she won’ she fakes being excited and runs to the reception area of her husband’s office to call up the jewellers. This is when she notices the necklace she was gifted. The secretary is wearing the necklace.
Now here is my question to all those who believe in the sanctity and everlasting nature of any and every marriage : How are any of the three above mentioned marriage sacred?